My World

Syawal is here again

2011-08-25T18:08:00.000-07:00

I'm writing from my office PC, and it's 3 days before Syawal. I'm planning to take my leave only in the noon, a day before the Eid Mubarak.

It's hard to imagine we're still going to have a meeting this very morning. Things are very different here in HQ compared to my working life in the power plant. By this time, all the staff at the power plant would be busy chatting with each other, either inside one of our collegue's room or at the newspaper corner in Level 3 about how we were going to celebrate our Eid Mubarak. Here in HQ, life is a bit mundane and everybody is still into their work, which adds a little confusion, as to what it is that's causing them to still throw a meeting at this time.

Anyway, this year's celebration won't be as much fun as last year, due to the following reasons:

1. My cat comel died on the 19th November 2010. I miss him, still do.

2. My Aunt Zukiah passed away in March 2011.
She 's one of my aunts who are still single (1 have 3 aunties who are not married) and when I was small , my perfect life would be ..you guess right, SINGLE, UNATTACHED, INDEPENDENT just like they are. They set the bechmark for me to be single lady who is confident to make her own decision, without any strings attached.
Anyway, things have changed as i'm married now. Back to Aunty Zukiah, she's overly perfectionist. However meticulous anyone is, nothing can compare to her level of perfection. She managed to bring the perfectionist world to a different height. Like Bonia and Coach, or..or..Kate Spade and Salvatore Fereggamo...She'll be the Coach and Ferragamo while the rest of us would be the opposite.

Take this for example, whenever any of her siblings were having open houses during raya, she would be the one to take control on the arrangement of things/food/utensils.

She was always there to criticize and re-fix our table and food setting which i find a little bit irritating and annoying (no, in fact it's actually VERY irritating) and we were always telling mama that there is no point in arranging and setting the table as she would come and re-arrange everything in a split second. (which made my mom furious as the person we were talking about was HER sister).

She passed away due to stroke and it was actually a tragic end to her life as she fell from the bathroom, all alone for 2 days. She was in a semi-coma the day my mom and her siblings broke into her house after many failed attempts to contact her handphone and her failure to turn up at my grandma's house during those 2 days.

Now, during this coming raya, things would be very different without her. Gone are the days when she comes for our open house and re-arrange everything and instructed us to follow her way. Gone are the times when she drops by to pay a short visit to her grandchildren (my son and my siblings' children).

We miss you Aunty Zukiah. We will always miss you. You're one of a kind. Selamat Hari Raya Aunty Zukiah. May Allah SWT bless your soul and place you in the Paradise.

3. My grandmother passed away on the 12th July 2011.
My grandmother, hmm...there's a lot to speak about her. I'll make a special post for her rite after this as i'm due for this MEEEETINGGGG sharp at 10.00 am

2011-01-09T22:32:00.000-08:00

I finally received my bonus for 2010 (at last) and after setting aside more than half of it, I’ve decided to splurge on a new pair of good running shoes. Influenced by the advert in SELF Magazine, I bought myself a second pair of Reebok toning shoes, but this time, it’s focusing on the running aspect.

The shoes is quiet costly, RM 399 but thanks to the Christmas Sale, there was a 20% discount which reduced the price to RM 319.00

I was intrigued for a pair of these shoes after months of reading this enticing Reebok advert promising a more toned calves, hips and butt for its wearer. I finally have to agree with my hubby that my butt has been giving its fair share of ‘saggingness’ (if there is even such a word).

My first reaction when I tried these shoes was how comfortable it is. It’s light and very airy and it has a bouncy effect during walking and running which I found different from other types of running shoes that I had. The color is not to my liking (green and silver, whoever thought of that!!) but it’s not something I can’t live with.

I've tried running with these shoes in the gym and after 15 minutes, i felt soreness and tightness especially on my hips area. I can't relate whether it's the shoe that’s causing me to feel this way or is it because I haven't been running for more than 1 week.

So, on whether it fits the purpose as promised by Reebok, let’s just wait for another 1-2 months while I try it out and re-measure myself.

Status of my personal achievement

2010-03-29T19:10:00.001-07:00

Dear blog

Remember my previous entre on my resolution? Which goes something like this:-

Resolution Number 1: To write a about my late brother inside this very own blog of mine- the fun we had together till the day he left us for good.
Resolution Number 2: To enter sprint category Triathlon for at least once in mylife time.
Resolution Number 3: To learn how to play piano (and of course, minus the "professional" word)
Resolution Number 4: To paint a drawing and hang it in my house (aha, my very own masterpiece , picasso in the making).
Resolution Number 5: To be a voulenteer (forget the spelling) in WWF by saving the endangered species (men excluding!!)

Here's the status update:

Resolution Number 1
Status: i'm yet to compile the list of my late brother's photos which i plan to turn them into a short video clip. My target to complete will be this August 2010.

Resolution Number 2:
Status: Err, guess i have to put on hold firt this target since hubby is kindda sceptical of me swimming in the open sea. For the time being, my focus would be completing the 10k run - at least 3 run for year 2010.

Resolution Number 3:
Status: Yeay!Guess what, i'm now offically declared Ms. Mozart in the making..har!har!Took up the courage to register myself in the piano class (The guitar shop) near my house. Currently, i'm in gred 1 and i'm using the Alfred book for adults to learn piano. Bought a second hand upright piano at RM 6k and has been practicing the piano at least 30 mnts during my free time. it's never easy to learn a new languange and it's the same with paino. I'm struggling to read the 'taugeh notes' most of the times but since i've made a promise to myself not to write the notes under the bar line, i guess I have to find extra time to revise the note reading from time to time. Currently, I'm learning to play Minuetto in C based from the ABRSM 2003 Gred 1 book. The good thing is, I'm not registring for any Gred 1 exam which means, STRESS FREE LEARNING ENVIRONMENT for me. I set a target to be able to play Beyonce's Hello by end of 2010. Go figure!

Here's myself playing the song from the alfred book.

Resolution Number 4:
Status: Since my last attempt to draw, i've produce 2 of my very own masterpiece. Currently, i've to put a stop to this to give way to my piano lessons. Anyway, here's two of my very own drawing, one hanged in my bedroom, another inside my bathroom.

Resolution Number 5:
Status: I've regsitered myself with WWF and made a contribution of RM380 per year to support the program. Nevertheless, I still want to challenge myself to participate in their endangered species program which i plan to do with my family by this August 2010.

All in all, out of 5 resolutions, 2 have started with progress, and 3 has yet to be achieved. I might be revieweing my resolutions especially on the triathlon case as my fitness level sucks big time this time.

My mom's Puding Raja recipe

2009-10-17T19:44:00.000-07:00

Ever feeling wanting to eat desert served for the malay royalty? Here's a recipe from my mom, known as Puding Raja. My mom first made this when i was a small kid and i just couldn't have enough of it. It has been years since i last tasted this mouth watering dish and while i was busy surfing the web, she presented me with this recipe, and requested me to give it a try.

Puding Raja

Bahan Bahan:

5-10 biji pisang lemak pahang/pisang nipah/pisang lemak manis (don't ask me the difference)
5 atau lebih buah prun
5 biji atau lebih ceri merah
5 biji ceri hijau
5 biji atau lebih kacang gajus
1genggam kismis (your option)

Bahan untuk kuah

1 liter susu cair
2 sudu besar susu pekat
1 sudu kecil tepung jagung
1 biji telur dipukul
125 ml air

Cara menyediakan:

Kupas kulit pisang dan goreng dengan minyak di atas api sederhana panas sampai warna bertukar kuning tua.
Bahan-bahan untuk membuat kuah dicampurkan dan digaul hingga sebati.
Masukkan ke dalam periuk dan masak sehingga mendidih
Kacau sehingga kuah menjadi pekat
Biarkan kuah tersebut sejuk sebelum dituangkan ke atas pisang. Hidangkan.

Viola1and the dish is ready.

What blood type RU?

2009-08-18T22:34:00.000-07:00

Admist the hectic working life and the non stop preparation for AKP 2009 assessment, a colleague of mine took the initiative (God, my english words revolve around initiatives, strategies, empowerment..blah!blah!blah!) to email us on the blood type and its relationship to our personalities. I'm a 'B+' and it's crazy to see the list of things related to your blood type. Let me just share here the details of it:

JENIS DARAH : B

Main Character Thinker; Task Oriented
Motto : Let do it the right /perfect way!!
Strength
1. IQ tinggi
2. Biasa golongan bijak pandai datang dari group darah B
3. Suka berfikir
4. Soft spoken
5. Fikir tentang sensitivity orang
6. Sesuai bidang R&D
7. Biasa excellence dalam pelajaran
8. Tempat kerja selalunya bersih
Weaknesses

1. Kalau jadi leader, orang biasanya tak boleh ikut cara dia
2. A bit pendendam
3. Moody
4. Agak pendiam
5. Kurang sesuai jadi leader
Ketahanan terhadap penyakit
Nampak semua bakteria (samada baik/buruk) adalah sebagai buruk dan dikeluarkan dari tubuh
Jenis penyakit yang biasa menyerang

Kronik ’fatigue syndrome’ / cepat lupa bila usia dah meningkat kerana terlalu banyak berfikir
Makanan sesuai
Balance diet (sesuai semua jenis makanan kecuali seafood bercengkerang)
Makanan tidak sesuai
Seafood bercengkerang seperti udang, ketam etc

Question is, how far does the above relates to me? so, here's the lists which I think is relevant to me:-

Main Character: - Yep, i'm a task oriented person. I keep every detials of my daily activities inside a diary.Don't be suprise to know i even jot down my food intake..yeah, freakkk....I'm NOT.

Strength:
IQ tinggi - har!har!well, kindda average..or i would've been the best student in the U
Thinker : Yep, at times..depending on topics that interest me...
Tempat kerja selalu bersih- Hell noooo...you'll be suprised to see my office desk..it's a total mess

In general, not all details described there are true but it'sfun to know the blood running inside your body have their own characterics to it too.

My very own master piece

2009-01-09T04:34:00.000-08:00

As promised in the previous entree of mine, I've at last fulfilled one of my previous year's goals , to have a piece of my mind, my very own masterpiece. I found this one shop which i've already forgotten the name (I became a member on my first visit). It's located at the new wing of OU. After getting my bonus for this year, i dragged hubby and my sister to this shop. The items are set at reasonable price and the sales person for the day was very open to answer all our questions. Before i realised, we went straight for our shopping spree and trust me, this was even better than shopping for clothes. Check out our purchase:

i) 5 canvas board (1 for me, 1 for my sis, 3 for the kids)
ii) 2 boxes of acylaric colors (12 colors in 1 box)
iii)paiting brush (we got them at cheaper price in the hardware shop in OU)
iv) Glossy paint (for glossy finishing)

So our quest to be the next picasso begun in the late sunday afternoon at my parent's house in Seremban. All of us sat at the patio, each holding the painting brush and started to sketch our thoughts. To play safe, i chose the abstract concept coz there is NO WAY you can go wrong with this concept. One black line can be considered an art, i convinced my sister. Kak long and abg li were to no denial blessed with very fine hands so it came to no suprise when they produced impressive arts.

Nuff said, I think i will continue with this new hobby of mine. After all, the colors are still wet inside the tubes.

My next attempt is to sketch this and to place it next to my bedroom door.Guess the price of this, RM 120? ekkk!wrong..it's RM1,200.00

I present my very first acrylic canvas drawing

BTW,I know! I know! it looks a little bit like the carpet sold at IKEA coz IT IS indeed the duplicate pattern of the carpet..minus the colors. Okeylah, for my first trial.

1 box of 12 acrylic tubes cost me around RM76.

Firas' very first canvas drawing, not bad for a 5 year old little kiddo

This canvas board cost me RM14.90. Cheap, yeah,indeed. compared to the paintings sold at IKEA

My son's next project, "Beware of the killer shark' a piece of his mind.

out of ideas

2008-11-19T06:46:00.000-08:00

I very seldom write in here since facebook makes its debut but that doesn't mean i totaly neglects this blog of mine. Firas is already asleep and hubby is away at the badminton court, trying his best to shrink his belly. I'm kindda sleepy but well, surfing the internet for a short while won't do any harm to my body, will it?

Comel the old cat is sleeping next to my keyboard and I'm sure he's glad that mommy is spending some time with him today. Gosh, why is it so difficult to express my thoughts lately? Everything is cluttered inside my mind, and I MEAN EVERYthing but I just don't know where to start.

Actually, I'm on my journey to seek for the IUI treatment, and basically, the treatment is going to start tomorrow.har!har! I'll have to go for shots (4 times every alternate days) and the insemination process is going to start somewhere on the 29th this month. I hope i can bare the needles and NO!I'm not going to do it on my own. I'll get a doctor (from the clinic nearby to do this for me).

I'm praying hard everything's gonna be okey and I'm still wondering, "what the hell are you doing girl?" I've spent much time thinking about this and decided that maybe, maybe this mite help me in getting pregnant for the second time..

So,i guess the next update will be in december 08...Hopefully, by that time, there'll be more interesting things to share.

And yes, I knoew, takde kena mengena gambar si aristotle with this article. But gee.. what the heck.

My Vote Goes For This Video Clip

2008-05-31T08:27:00.000-07:00

I just love the sound of the piano in this song, and not to mention the show.

My very own grilled chicken

2008-05-31T08:03:00.000-07:00

Dear Blog,

Today i decided to cook something different. Something more western. The menu goes like this:
i) Whole chicken -grilled with spices, onions and vegetables
ii) coleslaw
iii) baked beans - Thanks to Heiz for making my life a lot easier.
iv) toasted bread with butter.

With that, we had to go to Jaya Jucso to purchase the necessary ingredients and i started cooking at around 8pm and completed at around 9 pm. What made me so touched was when my son phraised me for the dishes. " Mama cook best sangat, nanti mama can cook like this next time ok?"....aww!Thank you anak mama.

Sleepy and yet not so sleepy

2008-05-08T08:39:00.000-07:00

I'm writing from my bed, next to hubby who is about to enter his dreamland. I'm kindda sleepy but let me just take a moment to write a few words in this blog of mine.

Today, I make a pledge inside this blog on the 4 things that i need to do to fullfill my life goal (BTW, none of them tied up with work! And yes, I'll put aside the datelines first). So, here goes:
1) To write a about my late brother inside this very own blog of mine- the fun we had together till the day he left us for good.
2)To enter sprint category Triathlon for at least once in mylife time.
3) To learn how to play piano (and of course, minus the "professional" word)
4) To paint a drawing and hang it in my house (aha, my very own masterpiece , picasso in the making).
5) To be a voulenteer (forget the spelling) in WWF by saving the endangered species (men excluding!!)

Actually, I wanted to add another final one to the list , to be a voulenteer for MAKNA but the thought of my late brother came into my mind and as off until now, it's too painful to even picture the scenario.

Anyway, I'm crazy about Grey's Anatomy. What was the guy's name , Dr. Patrick (Damsey?? huh?) and not to mention the song by The Frey : How to save a life. So, here goes my favourite song...Hmm...Unfortunately, I'm having problem now to copy the file from youtube to blogspot. Camne nak buat nie?

down with fever

2008-03-17T03:50:00.001-07:00

Dear my Blog,

Let me see, it's been ..1/2 year since i last wrote my entree? don't blame me, since facebook is making its debut, i hardly have time to write anything here. so, there goes, blame facebook and not me (see, how melayu is melayu, very much melayu aku nie). Ive just been promoted to take over the HRQ Manager post but I made a new discovery, this post is haunted, seriously. The moment i took this post on the 3rd of January 2008, I experienced many things, and the worst ever, its not doing good to my immune system. I was down with fever (the worst ever until i was admitted for 4 days in the hospital) last month, and this month, I'm back with fever again, a different set in which I was given another day of MC by the doctor. Do i like it? well, i do like to be on leave but being on leavy due to sickness...naah!

so, what else is interesting lately? hmm...nothing much, life is a bit plateu for me and work, i don't wanna talk about it, not something that brings passion rite now. Let's face it, being an assistant manager, you get a salary of RM 3700++, and being upgraded to a higher version, the so called manager, you are paid say, RM4000++, another extra of RM400-RM500..the work..extra extra..the responsibilities, extra, and seriously guys, one lesson to learn, DO NOT ACCEPT PROMOTION IN THE SAME OFFICE, coz it'll eat the fun person out of you...you become complesent, people depend moer on you, you already know the system, so, there's not much new things to learn except for the fact you're involved in more thinking skills and also meetings. And the bonus, you get to be the Management Rep (MR) for 3 systems...horrayyyyy!!! so, there goes, happiness, HEllooooo..disaster...

The day when my body goes headwire

2007-09-23T11:04:00.000-07:00

I discovered I developed swelling at the tonsil last friday after a visit to the doctor. At first, I thought it was just normal recurrence viral fever that I had a couple of weeks ago during my trip to Sabah. That answers the reason to why I was having difficulty in eating. BTW, it comes i one package, fever, body aches, difficulty to sleep, lost of appetite (lucky thing it's the fasting month) and duh!weight loss. To be fank, my low immunity system kindda worries me. Everything inside my body seemed to fall to pieces lately. That includes my mood swing, my fast heart beat (and NO, to answer to my "collegue", I don't have anxiety disorder, but the symptoms are similar though),my spinning head, and oh!oh!my broken heart.

And if you guys notice the time, it's now 2.13 am, on a Monday earliest morning, and i just can't get my body to sleep. I swollowed twice the drowsy coughing medicine (2 x 10ml = 20ml), which was supposed to help my ease my painful throat and get me to sleep but somehow, it failed to perform it's job.Wonder if i take another 10 ml of it, what would happen? (Just kindding, I don't want to die sucidal okey!). And talk about my broken heart, I seldom write anything with regards to my inner feelings in this blog. I'm not comfortable to have people reading it and start their own judgement towards me. But well, since I've already kept my fav all time diary in the safest place, I guess I just have to write something to ease my mind over here.

Being 30, I guess I've come a long way to adulthood. When I was 15, i always wonder what I would be like 15 years later. Whether or not I'm having the best career in the world, Married or not (but at that age, I was always a feminist, and my motto "never ever bagi muka to the boys who think that they are smart"), having children and the ultimate one, whether I'm satisfied and content with what I would have achieved or not. So, here I am, at that age, and life is just ...hmm...let me see, normal.it's average. Break it to three things, Career, Marriage, Life as a whole.

Career
When I was a kid, like any other kids in the world, I've got so many ambitions. At 7, i wanted to be a soldier, because that's what noble people always wanted to be. Then, it changed, at 8, I wanted to be a teacher, because I enjoyed educating my friends in case they have difficulty doing their homework, at 9, it changed again, from teacher to THE LAWYER, maybe because it sounded just the right thing to do. And I sticked to that ambition until I reached the age 12-14, in which I wanted to be a physicatric Doctor, because I looked forward to being the so called Pembimbing Rakan Sebaya in school.Somehow, at the age of 15, it all changed when I had a trip to UM Hospital, and hearing talks by Jaafar,one of the medical student seniors there. From there onwards, I set my head to become a doctor. I studied hard for my SRP, earned 6 aggregates with all straight As and ventured to a boarding school. Then, after SPM, my ambition became clearer, nope, not the law, not even the medical school since I got C6 fo biology , I took a path that I'never ever listed in my head, engineering.

So, after 4 years of studying, here I am, with a degree in electrical engineering. Somehow, I'm always a very determined, hardworking and positive girl. And that statement doesn't actually come from me, it came from my father, family and my close friends. I would do my very best to achieve whatever things that come my way and even though it's never easy, at the end of the day, I would managed to do it. Somehow, down the road, that little girl just got too exhausted you see, and decided to take a break, and she made a promise not to overdo the stay. That little girl is me, and now, I'm just too tired to make my way towards climbing the career ladder, not to mention the corporate ladder, lagilah, dah lama aku tinggalkan statement tu. Cuma, I just don't know what is happening to me now, I'm so demotivated, so bored to death, so exhausted and so not knowing what to do and what is best for me anymore. Everyday to the office is a strugle to me. What is worse, aku nie macam orang yang takde arah jer, which is soo not me...

But this is not what I wanted my self to be. I'm sure zila 15 years ago would've hated to see her like this. Something has got to be done, and that was why I decided to try out the post in HQ. To seek new knowledge, to learn something new with a new environment. But come to think of it, that's another stupid mistake that I've done to myself. Cause from what i heard, it's messy there. The whole thing, the work, the HQ environment, and now, I'm stuck with what I consider the stupidest mistake of ones life. And to counter back, I had to face the management and voice out my thoughts and my fear. And at the end of the day now, I'm making so many people around me pening, right from my manager, my GM and the HR GM. So, there goes, what ever thing have i donelah to my career?So, fast forward 15 years, I've learned a lot of new things in my career, the work, the money, people's turst for power, back stabbing, office polictics, name it..But question is, at the end of the day, have i achieved what i wanted when I was 15?That will be another topic inside my blog.At least adalah jugak benda nak tulis kan.

Marriage
To be frank, I've never thought I would ever get married. The word itself scared the hell out of me. I couldn't imagine devoting my self to a husband, lagilah kids kan. Another thing, growing up, I was the kid every parents would dread for. I was very rebellious, and degil pulak tu. I managed to change all that when I entered boarding school though. Maybe because I was away from my parents and somehow, the seperation managed to improve my quality of behavior. Anyway, I was never the mushy mushy I love you, you love me , BF..BF type. In fact, I hated guys during my teenage days. Dare to approach me, and I would gave them THE look. Not just the normal average look, the "Sorry, aku tak minat nak bercintan cintun dengan ko, hellooooooo" look. Yep!that kindda look. And I never understood why my friends were so into this guylah, that guylah...

Then, it all changed when i was in college, when i had the deepest crush for the guy next door. Not any typical guy, he was 2 yrs my junior. I went head over heels for him. Even my friends noticed the difference in me. Sadly, a crush was just a crush, and at the end of the final year, although we remain friends till now, both went different ways and followed different path. So, where was i just now? ok, marriage, then, at the age of 25, after findings THE ONE, I decided it's highly time to get married. But that wasn't the easiest decision made ever. In fact, I would say i'm very poor at making BIG decisions in my life, until now you see. Can't blame the genes, because my parents are not like that. At that particular moment in time, I had many thoughts in mind, my dying brother, my freedom, my singlehood, and to overcome those, I followed my heart and with prayers.

So, here I am, married with the sweetest son ever. Am I happy, let's just say, yeh!I do and I'm content. And I'm lucky to have a hubby who doesn't abuse me, understands me and love me to pieces. Cuma, marriage have it's ups and downs, and I hate the down part. In fact, I'm facing it now, the down part, and it hurts. And I just don't know what to do. Unlike those days when you have friends you could talk to when you have the slightest problem, now, you just can't do that you see. It'll be crazy to call you friends in the middle of the nite to pour your heart out. Let alone driving the car in the middle of the nite and showing your red eyes and bloated face in front of their houses, it'll freak them out.

With that, I have to manage it on my own. But I just don't know how. Call me nuts, but I have a fair argument with him over the topic I came out last nite. Come onlah, just because I'm like this, you know, macam nie, macam takde perasaan nie,macam budak budak niee,,don't think I don't have the jelously feelings. And excuse me, call me nuts again, but please lah, even in my mail or my sms with other people to other GUYSSSS, never have i mentioned the k_ _ _ me word to others. And comelah, not the photos all over the place while I was trying to browse the web!!Even the *I don't know what" guy on earth know how to hide the photos in front of their girls kan...Get it!!Yeah!i know that it's just a joke and it was not mentioned directly and it was just a PLAINN jokeeeee but...ARGGG!pissed me off betul. I've never felt like this before. But now, I do.So, nie rupanya that J feeling, like shit it is rupanyer, but you see, i have a fair argument jugak kan ..and yes, call me nuts the third time again, comelah!! I don't take small kids as my rivals okey."Bring it on" a more senior version sketlah. Anyway, forget I ever written this. I just wanted to pour out what I have inside my head so I won't have to think about it over again.And I know, nothing is going on pun but the fact that if he were in my position and to see me writing such a thing, I'm sure he'll be blown like this too.

Come to think of it, after 5 years in the journey of marriage, sometimes I do feel it has lost its sparks. But don't get me wrong, maybe because of the working environment which causes us human being to loose our sense of fun and humor that we had during the college years.Maybe also, we found ourselves to tight up with our own problems and tiredness that we don't even bother to understand each other's feelings. Maybe there is just a lot of "maybes" . Some people say, If we can pass the digit 10 in our marriage, we would survive the rest of this marriage journey. For at that age, the marriage has reached it's maturity level. But question is, what if we don't ? what happen next?

So, back to the topic of marriage, do I doubt sometimes that my marriage is gonna work? As selffish as I may sound, I do, sometimes. Why? Because in marriage, lies trust, love, commitment and lust, and in marriage also lies betrayal, hurt, hate and revenge. But of course, being a muslim, I'm taught to believe in the power of Doa and qada' and qadar. I'm also just a normal human being, and I don't even know what lies ahead of me.

Anyway, where was I? shit!Like I said, I can't think straight rite now. My head is spinning and my throat is burning, and my body is aching, and so does my heart, Who shall I blame this time? aaah!yes, the hormone, since I'm down with the red flag now. Well, I guess i need to sleep now.

Candy Man

2007-08-31T16:52:00.000-07:00

Here's one of my favorite video clips, and this one is by Christina Aguilera.."Candy man"..Lurve it!She looks oh!absolutely gorgeous in this clip...the hairstyle suits her, the face? vava voommmm!just like the old 1950s coke advertisement.The song is very catchy too.

Sexy Abs

2007-08-27T01:47:00.001-07:00

Let's see, today i feell like talking about abs...not my abs...it's ABS..in general....I've downloaded a exercise video from self webpage last week, and part of my weekend activities was focused on strengtening my abs...(dah ketak sket...call me perasan, i don't care...but seriously....less flabby and guggly (ada ke word nie? who cares, i like this word) than before). And thank you blogspot for releasing the video uploading. At least I can place my favourites exercises here. At first glance when watching the video, you wouldn't feel a thing. Seriously! Yelah, no tightening and abs movement going what...but after trying the exercise, I tell ya, you'll have this cramping feeling at your lower back and other parts of the body as well, which can be translated into 2 meanings:

a) You're doing the movements CORRECTLY and feeling the contraction of your muscles .

b) Are you kidding me? You're absolutely trying to kill yourself with the wrong movement.

Do try this 3 times/week in non-consecutive days for promising result. Why do I sound like the advertising people pulak nie?

Cup cakes

2007-08-24T00:04:00.000-07:00

I love cup cakes. In fact, I'm craving for one rite now. It's just very hard to resist and once you've got a taste of it, trust me, you just can't stop. It's like a ciggarete you see, except it taste a hell lot better. But of course, the maximum that I can take is two. More than that, it'll leave me bloating and the urgency to throw up.

What I like most about the cup cake is the frosting. They can come in different colors and with different patterns but with one conclusion, same level of sweetness. I like to eat mine by deeping my finger in the frosting and licking it. Yummy! .There was this one time I had a bad craving for cup cakes when me, hubby and firas were in KLCC. I made my way to the restroom while hubby had to take care of Firas. When I returned, hubby presented me with 2 cupcakes, which was nicely placed on a transparent box. It was a very sweet gift, as sweet as the taste. I didn't expect to find cupcakes in KLCC but according to hubby, the shop is kindda new. I can't remember the name of the shop though.

So, rather than buying cupcakes, I believe I should learn to make them by myself. I have to admit I'm not into making cakes & cookies, but it'll be a good try. In fact, I'm sure my son would love me for this. With that, my "Pencarian untuk mencari resepi cup cake akan bermula".....And when it does, let's just say I still have an excuse since I don't have an oven in the house to bake my cupcakes :)

Favourite photos

2007-08-22T20:45:00.000-07:00

Among all the photos of our son, this is by far my most favourite...

It was taken during our U-alumni high tea this year. Firas wasn't in good mood the time we reached the place but after seeing kak anis' son, nafeez, (middle) his face just glowed.

And oh!oh!My favourite photo of hubby is definitely this. Let's just say I lurve guys wearing baju melayu (this include my father, my brothers)...They just look good in it you see. Somehow, it makes them look more gentlemen, and neat and more masculine...har!har!(What in the world am i saying nie,IGNORE, just IGNORE)

.Hubby's gaya? Let me see, I'll give you 8 out of 10...Reason being, Baju tu compang sketlah...and bahu senget sket.....and the misai, needs trimming...har!har!

Gol and Gincu Target

2007-08-22T00:25:00.000-07:00

I went for my routine exercise at Fitness First yesterday. The routine that I did was as follows:

Strength Training

Lunges using machine :15 times x 3 reps
Walking lunges (w/o machine of course): 15 times x 3 reps
Sit up : 30 times x 3 reps (with break in between of course)
Sit up for the side waist: 15 times x 3 reps
Side ways body push up: Hold for 1 minute x 3 times

Cardio Training Using the elliptical machine
2 minutes :Pace 4
1 minute Pace 6
2 Minutes: Pace 8
1 Minute Pace 10
2 Minutes Pace 6
2 Minutes Pace 10
4 Minutes Pace 8
All in all : 14 minutes

My target:
1)To achieve higher endurance level (to be able to run 15 km tanpa rasa pancit)
2) and of courzzeeee...to have this body B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L babe,killer abs and absolutely firm thigh:

And here goes my next goal:
1) To complete a 10 km race without panting and within the timing set
2) To complete in the triathlon Novice Category (Sukan Wanita) next year within 50 minutes (last time I took was around 1 hour 15 minutes - If I'm not mistaken) and not feel embarrassed about it.
3) To compete in the dualthon by end of next year.

The price I have to pay for this??? let's just say it's huge! No more late nite dining, lots and lots of fiber, lean meat for protein, good healthy diet, discipline, and the list goes on...

Checkout my fav website at http://www.self.com/ . They have a lot of exercise programs that fits your target and goals with easy to monitor workout log.

It's just another manic monday

2007-08-20T01:50:00.001-07:00

I hate myself for hating Mondays!
I hate myself for being sleepy today!
I hate myself for letting my sickly son stays in his granpa's house while mama has to go to work!
I hate myself for not doing anything at the office today!
I hate myself for not fasting today!
I hate myself for spending all my money to I don;t even know where until I'm left with less than RM100 today!
I hate myself for hating myself at times!
and last but not least, I hate myself for writing this!

So there goes my proclamation on the things I hate about myself. Lega sket!

Down with fever

2007-08-12T04:21:00.000-07:00

I'm down with double F today, fever and flue since yesterday. Somehow, yesterday wasn't so bad since I managed to drive the car to KLIA to pickup hubby and drove to Putrajaya to have our breakfast. But today, I could hardly lift my head from the pillow and then there was a phone call at around 9.00 am in the morning from my collegue. I almost forgot that the fire fighting foam pump testing was supposed to be today.

Collegue: Shar, eh!ko tidur ke?

me : Mana ada, aku dah bangun dah. Tak sihat laa...Rasa nak demam (the fact I don't want

to sound as if I just woke up eventhough that's the actual fact)

Collegue: Camtu ko tak yah datang la.

Me : Aku datang nanti. Dah nak start ke?

Collegue: Tak. Nanti pukul 10 aku call ko lagi. Kite buat tengah hari sketlah aa.

Me : Okey

And there I was, staring at the wall, trying my best to close my eyes but couldn't. My head was still spinning when I made my way to the toilet. Went downstairs but nobody was around. Then I remembered that hubby, firas and my parents were having their Bfast at the mamak restaurant. I did feel like eating but I couldn't let my stomach empty. Had a bowl of cereal while watching the TV.

At around 11.30 am, my collegue called again.

Collegue: Eh, ko datang tak?

Me : Kul bape nak start?

Collegue: Lepas nie. Eh, ko tau tak tadi ada accident, crane jatuh.

Me : Crane yang mana pulak nie (Suddenly, my head felt heavy. There goes another CSI

investigation)

Collegue: Alah, crane yang buat gutter tu.

Me : Ko biar betul. Memain jer.

Collegue: Betul. Aku pun on the way nie.

Me : Aku siap lepas nie.

After waiting for hubby to return from the doby, we went straight to the station. Some of my office mates were already there, with the DGM and 1 manager. At the crime scene, there was this crane, tilted at the end side while the front portion was hanging in the air. It was raining heavily at that time and we had to proceed with the investigation while everything was still fresh.

What planned to be a fire fighting foam pump testing turned out to be something else. It took us around 3 hours to sort everything out. Shoot straight to my parents' in law's house to take my car at around 4.15pm.

As I'm writing this, nobody is in the house except for me and my 4 cats. All of them decided to go to my sis' house to taste her Soto. Me? Let's just say I'm trying to complete my AKP slides. Well, up until this time, I'm still not in the mood to do the slides. Err, I think my temperature is getting higher now. Somebody, please get me a panadol!!!

Here goes my definition of AKP:

AKP = $%#@!^&* S%^U$C#$K^&%$S%B&^I^%$G^T%$I$%#M%$E (if you know what I mean)

My Fitness plan for August 2007

2007-08-07T18:51:00.000-07:00

I've drafted my very own fitness plan for the month of August 07. Looking at another perspective, I'm kindda glad that the trip to Italy has been postponed. This enable me to focus more on my training plans. (But yang, pleaselah try to push it before the year ends). Problem is, I'm not consistent when it comes to executing the plans. So, rather than keeping the plans hanging inside my PC, I've decided to include it inside my blog and get a printed copy pasted on my office wall to ensure it's being religiously followed.

Here's comes the plan:

Italy, please wait for me

2007-08-06T21:38:00.000-07:00

I received a devastating news from hubby last week, about him returning to KL from Italy due to problems associated with visa and work permit. Don't get me wrong, it's not about him returning home becomes the devastating news, but the fact that I have to postpone my trip to Italy. I've been looking forward for this trip and haven't being progressing well in office lately.

There's a lot of things need to be re-organized such as:

a) Picking up my cutie cats from Nannie Annie who is ever willing to take care them for 3 months straight (And yes, I do pay for the cats' accomodations and mahal pulak tu..isk!)
b) Reschedule my training regime with Jane
c) Postponement of my unpaid leave and explaining to the management the reason behind it.
d) Reschedule my flight to italy and from what i heard, it's fully booked in October.
d) and the list goes on and on and on

According to hubby, it'll take around 1-2 months for the permit to be issued. Yeah rite! It takes the company a business class trip to Italy for them to discover that err..well, the new regulation just took effect 2 weeks ago....

I do hope the whole document will be ready by middle of October so that i can still proceed with the plan.

Hubby was thinking to bring me somewhere (tioman eh, or was it sabah???) to mend my broken heart kot....But as for now, i don't feel like going anywhere for this heart of mine is still burning with fire.

Gym dilemma..

2007-08-02T01:52:00.000-07:00

I'm not an athletic person at heart but i do believe that I'm quite active. I discovered that staying active is the only thing that keeps my mood and energy high. Question is, why is it lately i feel so worn-out? I'm sure it's got nothing to do with my mood swing since i've passed the cycle a couple of weeks ago.

Now, now... I'm not going to rumble about my emotions you see. I've got an appointment with my gym instructor today and I just don't feel like going. Not that i'm making excuses not to go but I feel a sharp pain on my calves due to previous day's training and I'm pretty sure if i continue today's appointment, it's going to get worse. I guess i'll just tell Jane that i prefer to focus on my upper body and not doing vigorous training on the treadmill.

The worst part is, i didn't even take my breakfast today and while on my way to HQ to see my GM, i drove straight to McD for a set of Quarter Pounder Medium Set. Ahhh!So much of exercising betul...How will i ever blast the fat at my butt nie..

2007-08-01T19:21:00.000-07:00

Hubby chatted with me yesterday and told me to update my blog. Yeah, the blog hasn't been updated since God knows when....and i'm just soo not in the mood to write anything now, and my laziness has reached tahap cipan....isk!what did i ever do to be this hopeless? What to write lah yang, my days consists of routine things, getting up from bed (eh!no..tilam lah, since i've been living in my mom in laws house since the day you went away and the fact that firas and me lurve to sleep under the cold air condition.), rushing to work, do this and that, running around, going to the gym, returning to firas and sleep while waiting for the sunshine to rise the next morning....

I've got a lot of things in my head lately, things that i'd rather keep to myself...(ladies do have secrets, ok)....but okeylah, to tell you the truth, i'm looking forward for the trip to the city of renaissance...olala!the leaning tower of pisa, the food, the hot looking guys (har!har!gotcha)... most importantly, the fact i can get away from my boss.

Some people ask me, do i care about taking unpaid leave to got to italy? Nope. Do i care it's going to effect my promotion? Hmm, nope. Do i care it's going to effect my pre-retirement benefits? Nope. Do i care if my boss cares? Hell no!

So, italy, I'll be seeing you next month. And yang, I'll try to find something nice to say after i manage to tune my head.

My first day of fitness first

2007-06-22T08:09:00.000-07:00

Promises are meant to be broken. This words are meant for me indeed. I've made a promise not a very long time ago that I'll never ever register myself as a gym club member. The novice triathlon event howevr changed my perception towards fitness club. After strugling with stamina, strength and endurance problem during the event, i've made a profund thought about joining my hubby in Fitness first (FF). After consulting my sis and doing a bit of study and vice versa, I walked my steps to FF on wednesday nite.Before i go on, allow me to state the reasons why i dread going to the gym:
1) I dont like doing my excercise on crowded places full of people. Makes me suffocate.
2) I hate doing excercise inside a confined area. Again, makes me suffocate.
3) I can't bear running on the treadmill while watching the TV on-screen. Seems to me the world stops spinning but the track keeps on moving jer.ayaya! And again, makes me suffocate.

But of course, time and again i have to remind myself that 'I really need to set a proper training' in order to ensure my fitness level is at the highest par before i can compete in another Marathon, Traithlon and all other THON THON competition. With that, I also hire my personal trainer, Jane and the training session begun by her asking me to do a complete set of weight training for the upper body and lower body, flexibility, streching and a test on the cycling machine to see how far i can reach before i turn all blue. Suprise !Suprise, all these while i thought my fitness rating is around 5/10 but as it turned out, it was actually 2/10 (according to Jane)...mampos camni....sah kena bertungkus lumus cam nak rak lepas nie..and why is it i felt sooooo bloody sleepy while I'm writing this? Hmm...guess my energy level depletes kot....

Advanced Bday present

2007-06-21T06:35:00.000-07:00

I'm never a person who'd like to lavish those dear to me with birthday gifts & cards. Come to think of it, I must have gotten this trait from my dad. Seriously, it's not something that I'm proud of. Since I got married to my hubby, I can count the number of times i've purchased a suprise card/gift for him. There was even this one time (last year), where i've forgotten to wish him during our anniversary. Ouch! That really suck!No, I suck BIG TIME.

With that, for this year, I made a promise to actually spend my money to buy something superior for my hubby. All these while,I've made promises to buy a PSP, a mini piano etc but decided to change my mind the very last minute when i discovered that the price of it errrr...kindda expensive.

Well, dear. Not this year though. I've excercised my ESOS money and since I'm a little excited over the thought of entering a triathlon and a dualthon this year, I've draged my hubby to cycle along with me. (I bought a hybrid bicycle recently which cost me around RM 1, 050.00 but it's worth the penny since it's fast, its light and it rocks!)

Problem is, he doesn't have a bike on his own. So, to cut the story short, I decided to present him with a road bike as an advanced birthday present. Since he was ok with that, the search for his bike went on. My budget is limited to RM 1,500.00. Our first destination was to bikepro, a high end bicycle shop which have variety of choices to choose from. But none of the bicycle there fits my budget. With that, we went to Tat Seng, the place where I bought my bicycle. The shop was about to close when we reach there at around 7.40 pm but the owner (kelvin) was kind enough to entertain us with our bombarding 101 for DUMMIES questions on bicycles. Hubby was so energized when he saw the bike and after given much thought about it, we finally met the perfect bike for him. So, here's the new buddy that I have for my dearest hubby:

For a road bike that fits the bill as an entry level bike, I swear that the bike is a value added item. Of course, It's a bit heavier as compared to my bike but it's ok since the size is bigger than my Scott USA and the tyres are thicker.

Somehow, I have no regrets buying him this as a birthday present coz i could see his face beaming with joy when he looks at it. By the way yang, jangan buat display sudah beskal tu...ari sabtu nie kena gak bawak gi ke putrajaya for a try out.

polar watch vs polar bear

2007-06-18T02:37:00.000-07:00

My watch was found to be defective since last week and while waiting for hubby to complete his mini-olympic in Uniten on a Saturday (and due to the fact that firas was crying his heart out after seeing a clown), i decided to bring firas to Alamanda. The first shop I entered was Fitness Concept. Actually, I've been aiming to purchase this polar watch for quite some time and after reading the webpage at http://www.polarusa.com/, I decided to head on my search for this watch. And mind you, it was easier when hubby is not around coz he'll be asking me to ' write a justification report' on the reasons to purchase this watch.

So, here goes yang:

1) I need a new watch to replace the defective one

2) Which can do the function of calculating my heart rate, timing during excercise, calorie count and etc

3) to pamper myself after long working days

4) just excercised my ESOS, so, gile koselah sket bila nampak duit tu kan..

So, there i was, browsing through the pamplets and looking through deciding the best watch that fits me and most importantly, fits my pocket...It kindda gave me a slight headache when Ibrowse through the catalog coz banyak nor gadget statement..har!har!I'm sure my mother would definetely 'lurve' this kindda gadget since she's indeed Mrs. Gadget. (she couldn't help resist buying all sorts of electronic goods and later, anak menantu dia yang nak kena teach her on how to use) Since my budget is limited to RM 450-RM500, i chosed the Polar F6, which has the following functions:

1) ECG heart rate - to monitor your heart rate

2) Calorie counter - to of course monitor the calories you've burn after an excercise

3) Max and Min heart rate

4) Mode of excercise (light, medium, hard)

5) Distance etc

6) ada banyak lagi, dalam manual tu...(safe statement to counter back in case hubby says anything)

The one thing i dislike about the watchthough is the size. It's kindda bulky on my wrist in which doesn't really suit me. Secondly, the color is kindda dull (blueish grey). Anyway, since i already like the watch for the functionality ("What is style, without substance" tul tak??), and having much thought about it at the shop, i agreed to pay the bill. Firas didn't like it, coz he sincerely said " not nice mama." Well, i'm sure he would have preffered the polar bear instead:

I managed to wear the watch for only 2 days since i discovered that the 'lights on' function was not working. So, yesterday, i went to Alamanda again to get a replacement and guess what, it can actually function but i need to perform a few settings on the screen before the 'lights on' function can be activated. Eureka!and why didn't i think of that??Because i was so excited wearing it here and there until i have forgotten to read the manuals completely..oh!well, silly me!

photos during the sukan wanita triathlon novice

2007-06-15T09:21:00.000-07:00

yea!and the game is over!!

My colleague laughed her heart out when she saw this photo "you look like a small kid" oh well!Gotta to thank my height for that. Who says being short is a disadvantage?It sure does rewind ones biological clock...

oh God, at last, the suffering is over!

And here comes the Hero, or shall i say HEROES since it's more than one?

Coverline jer nie.,..takut tau tak!!

Mama and Yash before the start of the event

Novice triathlon result

2007-06-15T08:59:00.000-07:00

I've just checked my result on my first ever triathlon event and well, guess i did okey. Out of around 21 participants, i clocked in at number 18 with 1:05:06. The breakdown of the timing is as follows:
- 200 meters Swimming:15 minutes (what the hell took me so long?? oh yeah, , the fact that i was definitely pathetic at that time)
-8km cycling :35 minutes (Need to improve on the timing, need to..the best cycling timr for the novice category was at 23 mnts, gosh! she's fast)
- 2 km running :14 minutes (This is errr..kindda okey)

So, all in all, way to go jijie!for the fact i've challenged myself to participate in this race, to bear the humiliation of swimming in the lake when even the ducks can swim wayyy better than me, to endure the blistering wheather, and to comprise on the pain that i had during the run, with that, i should give myself a credit.